Today was another day. I won't bore you with the details or regale you with falsified heroics, but I will say, happily, that the flatulence has passed. (Get it? Passed? I'm clever!) I will also say that you didn't appear to be overly interested with said gas. Perhaps I will bring it up again at a more opportune time, such as the next time we meet in person. (Get it? I made a funny again! So clever!) I'm really not that sure why I'm still talking about it.

The person upstairs is taking a shower. Just thought you might want to know. I know because when he/she/they do, it sounds (in our apartment) as if someone is being bludgeoned (sssshrrrreeeeeewweeeeeahhhhhhhhhh..., etc.) upstairs. Earlier today, even though my doors and windows were closed, I heard our neighbors bitterly arguing (again); later, I heard what I'm pretty sure was them making up--and I don't mean verbally (You're right, that was a bit risque to share; yet it was so cleverly worded).

If you were so clever, wouldn't you have found a synonym for "clever" by now?

I'm feeling more and more like I should report their dog (decidedly not allowed) to management. But it would be such a shame if their lease was terminated...

P.S. Shower's over.

I have gas. Are you interested in knowing such things? I could continue to give updates on this matter. Other people in my apartment probably have had gas at some point as well, but I'm probably not allowed to report/comment about that. I may have already gone too far; I'm sure you suspected as much. But lets be clear: everyone has gas. Even the dog. Even Moom. You know who you are.

I was thinking of taking some video of Sarah's birthday, but a two things held me back. First, if I filmed her opening presents, I wouldn't have been allowed to post the video until later in the week (as she mentioned, she and Rebekah have identical gifts, and Rebekah ruined things by not being born until May 4). Second, the last time I took video was that day I filmed big waves on the beach (see "Max's Videos"). This, in itself, isn't the problem; the problem is that the gusting wind filled every crevasse of my video camera with sand. It's a good thing Costco has an overly-generous return policy; though, it could be the end of videos for a while: you never know what kind of Ipod/camera/musical instrument/cash deposit in my savings account might strike my fancy...

Today (May 2) is Sarah's birthday. Don't forget. Or else.

I read an article today reporting that new research suggests migraine headaches cause brain damage. During a migraine, cells in the brain are deprived of oxygen, and it is theorized that this causes a number of problems. As an occasional migraine sufferer, I find this troublesome. But, I also find it encouraging--just think how smart I used to be...