In other news, I bonked heads with a guy on the basketball court during a rough game yesterday. I was trying to steal the ball from him when the bone that protects my eye hit his head. Hey body: Good job protecting my eye, what does a guy have to do around here to get an eyebone-protecting bone?
I don't have a black eye, exactly. I would call it more of a mark that makes me look like a female model. You know, the ones who wear purple eyeshadow or mascara or whatever they use to look lusty. (Lusty? Is that a thing?). Only, because I've only got the mark on one eye, I look more like someone trying to make a fashion statement. Or a visually challenged lady of the night.
Fortunately for me, my condition is just temporary. Unfortunately for the other guy, he's afflicted by oafishness and anger that won't fade quite so quickly. At another one point during the game (before we bonked heads), he turned to me, glared down (he was a BIG guy), and screamed in my face: "If you ever do that again, I swear to *&^ that I'm going to punch you in your &*^%$%^ face, $%#$%^."
I have no idea what I did, but I did quickly discern that he needed a breath mint. Which is exactly what I told him. He didn't understand the hilarity of my response.
4 comments:
Isn't Texas an open carry state...
Gender identity issues you will have if you start to like the new look...
He must have really liked you after the head bonk, which might have been intentional perhaps...
Borrow some eye makeup and match up those blue eyes! Basketball sure brings out the beast in some guys, doesn't it?? In most spheres of life, we teach kids to share and be nice, then teach them to play games where they are shoving, grabbing the ball right out of people's hands, and sometimes knocking them down to get it. But it IS such fun! Maybe that's part of why they are fun--we get to act just a little bit feisty! Mom
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