Christ instructed his followers to forgive offenses committed against them. For most of us, this isn't exactly an easy task. As it turns out, that guy from Nazareth might actually have been on to something.
Carlsmith, Wilson, & Gilbert (2008) did an experiment in which the participants played a game where the goal was to work together with the other participants (who were actually in on the experiment--confederates) to make money. One of these confederates always screwed up the game with negligence and ruined it for the real participant. Later, some of the participants were told they were going to be allowed to punish the confederate by taking money away from him. Other participants were told simply that the game was over.
All participants predicted that they would feel better if they were allowed to punish, but in reality, those who punished (a) continued to think about what happened and couldn't move on, (b) were in significantly worse moods than those who didn't punish, and even (c) thought they would have felt even worse if they hadn't been able to punish--THE EXACT OPPOSITE OF WHAT ACTUALLY WOULD HAVE HAPPENED.
In other words, even if forgiveness is hard, even if it seems like it isn't fair, even if it sometimes doesn't make sense, it's the better way. True 2000 years ago. True today. True always.
5 comments:
Forgiveness is without a doubt the only thing that will always work. However, revenge can be sweet also, even if it is painful.I forgive those wasps that attacked me,but I did kill them!!!
True DAT! So this means you forgive me for making you clean your room and do chores and wear kmart tennies? :) Mom
Interesting! The idea of getting even is so ingrained in us. Of course, justice will eventually prevail for all wrongs suffered...although maybe not down here!! Jan
Amen. I love the timelessness of Christ's wisdom.
Oh mom, I think Kmart shoes, even Jesus draws the line there...haha KIDDING!
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