Today, I played a game called “Go to bed at a normal time and then be awoken at 3 AM by a blood-curdling scream emitted by a gleeful yet suddenly upset drunken woman outside your bedroom window.” It was originally manufactured by Parker Brothers but the Department of Defense bought them out in order to modify the game for use with inmates at Guantanamo. It’s quite exhilarating: so much so, in fact, that I finally got back to sleep around 7AM, only to be awoken by a similar game called “My wife keeps pestering me and won’t go away until I get up and go to church with her, but I’m so tired.” This game was originally manufactured by my wife. It too is now used at Guantanamo.