Quite frankly, nobody is watching anybody: it’s 2 AM, and everyone but me is asleep. As I type, I’ve been quite distracted by the giant container of “extra fancy, mixed nuts” that sits in front of me. I actually just found myself wondering how many cashews I can fit in my mouth at once. I figure around 50: 20 in each cheek and then ten in my actual mouth.

As it turns out, 46 will fit.