It’s something that really pains me to say, but I’m a terrible Chess player. I think I have too much confidence in my own intelligence, secretly believing that whatever move I make will lead to something unbeatable. In reality, I’m quite sure that even the most bird-brained pigeon-of-a-player can think two moves ahead; in this I am quite confident: while I was playing on the internet today, I’m pretty sure I lost a two rooks and a bishop to a common tufted titmouse.