While taking a break from reading for my class, I was reading an article on ESPN.com about Michael Phelps' latest triumph, a gold medal in the 200m butterfly. The author declared,

In the fly, his signature stroke, Phelps was second at the first flip, then pushed it into another gear, his long arms gobbling up huge chunks of water as he literally sailed along atop the surface. He touched the wall in 1 minutes, 52.03 seconds, breaking his mark of 1:52.09 from last year's world championships.

Well no wonder the guy is the best swimmer the world has ever seen: he's a frickin cheater! Sailing along atop the surface?!? Does everybody else get a boat too? I'm shocked that he hasn't been disqualified.

Here's a tip for all you professional writers out there: use of the word "literally" indicates that something is actually happening in real life. As in, I'm literally not sure how this story got picked up by the AP without basic editing. I think you meant something along the lines of, "Michael Phelps was figuratively sailing along atop the surface." You actually meant to say the antithesis of what you did indeed write. Oops.

Of course, it's not as bad as the NPR reporter I heard a while back. She was talking with a woman and noted that she could "literally see dollar signs in her eyes." In her eyes? Help! Someone call an ophthalmologist!

Crunch time. And unfortunately, I'm not talking about Doritos.

For a while, the tabloids have been claiming that John Edwards fathered a "love child" out of wedlock with a former staff member. Edwards had been vehemently denying those claims, but earlier this evening he admitted to having an extramarital affair back in 2006. This story is unfortunate for several reasons: (a) he actually had the affair--devastating his family, (b) he gave some undue legitimacy to the National Enquirer, and (c) he disappointed me personally--his activism for the plight of the downtrodden and his engaging and sensitive personality gave me some hope for the future of the Democratic party (no offense to Senator Obama). While he is still the same person he was yesterday, he's now just another name on the long list of politicians who publically stump from a platform of morality and values but 'privately' stoop to the gutter of sexual indiscretions.

We all have our vices, but the lure of sex seems particularly strong for politicians. Even the moral ones. I wonder how much more work would get done in Washington if we just mandated that everybody on Capitol Hill take Depo-Provera (an agent used in chemical castration) for the duration of their terms?

Let's get that on the next ballot.

Today in my history of psychology class my professor was lecturing about Friedrich Nietzsche, who has been historically seen as very anti-Christian in his views (he made the famous proclamation that "God is dead"). My professor said that Nietzsche is one of her favorite writers (both for the quality and content of his writing), but as she was explaining his three main problems with religion, my professor kept her back turned to the class for an extended moment and finally exclaimed, "I just can't look at Max when I'm saying this."

Some say it's difficult to be a Christian in a secular university, but apparently it's actually us who are making them uncomfortable.

I've been busy this past week with my midterm essays for my summer class. Unfortunately, now that I've finished, there are only two weeks left in the term, and I'm going to have to hustle in order to get everything done for the final. I'm pretty sure it's still better than having a real job.

In other news, my real job (adjunct lecturer, if you'll recall) has been going well. I'm pretty sure that working 5 hours a week is a pretty ideal situation. Other than the money thing. That's how they get you.